hares Paddy Boy and Pornstar
Over 60 hashers from BKK, Chiang Mai, Chiang Rai and even Siem Reap attended this historic 3 country hash on October 13th. The CR hashers included the ever lovely Stung, the ever jovial Shocking along with his son, Superglue and his wife, Pat on the Back, the ever adventurous Do It Yourself and Do It Better, the long lost Duncan Go’nuts, the ever pedantic GM Namron, the ever blackberrying Hand Cock along with the two timing hashers Paddy Boy and Godzilla. The day started poorly when hashers piled into the bus in Chiang Rai only to find out that there were only 50 seats but 65 hashers. The initial enthusiasm of those unlucky 15 quickly faded as they realized they were going to be on their feet for the next hour and a half. However, the hares seeing that mutiny was close at hand quickly found a rental minivan and piled the extra 15 into it. The misadventures continued when Hare Pornstar driving a rented Volvo failed to remember the way (obviously sleep deprived from the previous night’s shenanigans) and the coach proceeded to make 4 U-turns in an attempt to follow – each time drawing sighs from the restless hashers. After two hours, everyone finally arrived at the starting point – a small trail cut into some brush in the middle of nowhere. The hares set out at a brisk pace laying the paper in live fashion. The walkers set out soon after them with the runners hanging back giving the hares time to set the checks. It turned out the checks were only for show as the 3.9 km trail never veered off the main dirt road. The course was mainly uphill and was hot in the mid afternoon sun so everyone arrived at the ending Wat drenched in sweat. The beer was late to arrive but no one seemed to notice as the gorgeous view of the Golden Triangle and the hill tribe kids taking pictures with tourists occupied them. After some beer and water a quick downhill on a footpath dumped everyone at the immigration department. Thankfully Paddy Boy’s wife had already taken care of the paperwork so that all the hashers had to do was pile in a boat – next stop Burma.
About half way across the river late season rains deluged the boats which were forced to slow down to a crawl. Eventually both boats arrived at the dock and after a 15 minute wait, we were ushered in through customs. Finding the initial paper proved to be harder than any subsequent check as the trail was basically a straight line with one right turn. The group enjoyed crossing a small river using either a ladder or cement pipes. Numerous hashers got wet because of slippery, mud-covered shoes, too much alcohol or a combination of both. The less adventurous walked from the boats directly to the beer stall and enjoyed a good 30 minutes of uninterrupted Myanmar beer drinking before the runners started showing up. The runners were wet, scratched and muddy however the samosas and beer were ample compensation to keep them content. Looking like a group of misfit Rambo wannabe’s no one was allowed to go into the casino to tempt fate.
The final hash was in Laos, on the shopping island. Small stalls with thatched roofs selling whiskey with cobras and scorpions and other Lao goods were situated among giant Ngiu trees. Similar to Burma, the trail was overgrown with grass but the trail in Lao was much more scenic and enjoyable. A FRB group got off to a fast start staying close to the hares but one exceptionally difficult check gave the others time catch up. Thorn bush covered tunnels, leg cutting grass and ankle deep mud puddles added a feel of adventure to the course. The hash ended with Beer Lao and a setting sun.
The boats took us across the Mekong to a Thai northern style restaurant with tables set up on the lawn, overlooking the river. The BKK hashers called a circle and proceeded with the usual antics. Unfortunately the Scottish accent of the GM was barely discernible so the crowd eventually drifted towards the tables and enjoyed a fantastic northern style dinner and endless pitchers of beer. Amazingly all passports were returned and no hashers had been lost! On the bus ride back to CR entertainment was provided by the BKK hashers and their endless risqué songs.
