January 17th - Write Up

Officially, Dragon Ball, Johnnie Walker, Creeper Peeper and NoName set up this hash for us. Unofficially, it seems Namron had  very low confidence in them and decided to set out the course mostly by himself. Now, I’m not a parent, but it does seem to me like a strange way to boost your kids’ self-esteem…

Anyhow,  it was a small hash, only 15 hashers showed up. The relatively low attendance can be explained by the recent holidays:  trips back home, trips within the country and trips to the liquor store.

After the usual brief explanations, we were on our way. According to Brown Eye For The Queer Guy (a visiting hasher), the human’s orientation center is situated in the nipples. That is why he immediately took off his shirt (for optimal cooling of the orientation center, I assume) and proceeded to lead the entire hash to run the loop in the exact opposite direction. Only the hash cash and the hash scribe knew better than to trust an outsider for directions. This lead to a brief but very eloquent debate halfway in (names are withheld to preserve the dignity of some debaters):

-You’re going the wrong way.

-No, YOU are going the wrong way!

-I don’t think so.

-I DO think so!

-Well then, we’re continuing.

-Well then, we are too!

Both groups made it back pretty much at the same time but clearly, for having run the loop in the right direction, the views were much better for H2Hoe and me.

The circle

According to Brown Eye For the Queer Guy, the human body’s social center is situated in the navel. This is why (I presume) that he kept his shirt off during the whole circle, even if the temperature got pretty cold.

We had 3 virgins: Farah and a couple of friends of Wirgin Bluce, Rhondi from Oregon and her husband, Andy.

Christened hashers:  Bad Hobbit (for doing an entire hash bare feet)

So fast yet so muscular award: Brown Eye For The Queer Guy

Going the right way despite everybody else going the wrong way award:  H2Hoe and Frozen ring.

Many thanks to Namron (and the kids) for making this awesome trail!

-Frozen Ring

No Songthaew for Jan 15th Hash

Due to lack of interest, there will NOT be a songthaew taking people to the hash.  If you need a ride, Wirgin Bluce said he could take 1 or 2 people. 089-635-3224

Driving Directions to Sat. Jan 17th Hash

The hash this Sat. the 17th will be set by virgin hares Dragon Ball, Johnnie Walker, Creeper Peeper and NoName.  The starting location will be at  19.968011°, 99.768621° which is on the road to Mae Yao, route 1207.  Drive just past the archway (see picture below) and look for Soi 1 on your left.  Turn down the soi, go about 50 m. and park on the left.  Starting time 3 pm.  The forecast calls for snow so bring your ice skates and cross country skis.

There will be an on-on after the hash at a yet undetermined eatery.  Also, if you need a ride, email Namron as soon as possible so he can arrange a songthaew. jbclair at yahoo.com 

Write Up of Christmas Hash 2014

The Christmas hash was set and hosted by a swollen legged, barely-able-to-walk, dis-Abled Semen.   35 paying hashers attended and 4 freeloading kids managed to sneak into the gala.  Because of his injury, Able Semen’s grand vision of having hashers scaling Doi Chang with ice axes and crampons had been scaled down to a 5 km walk around the rolling hills.  Even though it wasn’t the longest hash, Able Semen’s exceptionally difficult checks managed to fool front running hardman Ultra Dik and his yet un-named fast running accomplices, giving shrewd running Oral Banger a chance to keep up with the FRBs and in perfect timing finish the hash with yet another victory and bragging rights for a month.  

The On-On was at Able Semen’s estate and hashers were treated to a chilly block of ice and a warm dinner.  The circle was managed by newly elected GM Cop Out who wore red Christmas cones over her nipples  which accentuated her excitement at being in charge without having to pull out her gun.  Her better half, Agent Orange, proved especially adept at providing refreshments and fulfilling his new position as hash beer.  The new scribe, Frozen Ring, and hash cash, H2Ho, however failed to attend because they said they prefer it long and hard and chose to go to Chiang Mai to run a marathon instead!  The result of this is yet another piss poor write-up in shoddy English (je suis Namron) and the finances in complete disarray by Try-Sexual.  Cop Out’s GM debut was quite entertaining, especially when she had the DFL lost group lead by Scotch on the Rocks and Wirgin Bluce come into the circle, tie bells around their waists and gyrate out a Jingle Bells for everyone.  Air Canada, Shocking, Pat on the Back and a few other long-lost hashers were back in attendance, most likely because of the 50 baht Christmas dinner.  Oral Banger gave Cop Out a splash while pointing out that even though we had a block of ice, the block effectively had a condom on it, lessening the pleasure it provided for hashers.  During the naming session for a young Greek woman a split vote emerged.  On one side stood Hand Cock and the genteel pushing for “Feta accompli” and the other stood Dragon Balls and the less-sophisticates pushing for “SpartaPuss.”  Cop Out solved the impasse by pointing out that most of the voters in Hand Cock’s group had not even done the hash, just coming for the party.  During dinner, Able Semen provided us with Dutch Christmas music and Cop Out showed her true dancing talents.  Finally to the dismay of the children, the naughty hashers were passed over by regular visitor Santa Claus, who got too drunk to make it to party this year.  

The next hash will be on January 20^th so be on the lookout for driving directions that should appear in your inbox within the next week.